The Emptiness of Self-Indulgence

Just a little more
We tell ourselves
So full on superficial
We can’t fill up on the spiritual
The fruit of good works
Gets placed on a shelf
Because self
Is what our eyes set on

Our time—this is my time—
It’s high time that I get what I want
And it’s not long
Before self-care becomes self-worship
Rather than enjoying rest
As a gift God ordained to replenish
We binge on food and Netflix
We’re selfish abusers of gifts
The gifts God’s given us to enjoy
But by over-indulging
We lose all joy
Loving gifts
More than the giver
We twist what’s meant to bless

Things like beauty
So busy trying to be pretty
Our closets overflow with clothes
We go on shopping sprees
And expose our apathy
To those living in poverty
We’d rather buy new jeans
Than give to the least of these
Stuck in front of a mirror
We indulge our glory
Rather than being captured by God’s
Beholding beauty is a blessing
But we won’t see his face
If we’re obsessed with our own

Ha, some of us say
We’re not so shallow
To care too much about looks
But we don’t see how we’re hooked
Indulging our ears with gossip
Always asking
What’d they do, what’d they say,
Give us more details more dirt
We relish in sinister whispers
Of secrets and slander
And bask in feeling better
Better than the one who did this
Better than the one who did that
We wear pride like a crown
As our haughty eyes look down
On others

Our self-indulgence fills us empty
And pretty soon that pain needs to be hushed
So we pour an extra glass of wine
Or 3 or 4
As we whine about wanting more
We long to hush our longings
And soon we indulge anything
That gives us belonging
Trying so hard to shut up
This raging in our souls
That begs for something more

But for all our self-indulgence
God in his kindness
Won’t let us be filled
The emptiness is an invitation
To better know him
The one we were made for
He is the beauty we long to see
The glory we crave
The majesty
His words are like honey
His laws our protection
His gospel the way of our resurrection
His name the only fame that matters
And in his presence
there’s no such thing as over-indulgence
Because there’s always more grace
More glory
More goodness to be had

So we run the race
Looking ahead to the one
Who won the race for us
So that we could know him
And finally be filled.

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